Well hello there fellow bloggers. Today's blog is entitled high anxiety for a reason. I have a problem with high anxiety. Now if any of you know me, you would think that I'm pretty laid back. Quite the contrary in fact. I'm laid back to an extent, but I do suffer from high anxiety. Which has been a huge problem for me lately.
Most of my anxiety stems from a lack of self confidence and appreciation for myself. I am constantly worrying I'm going to let my family or friends down. Which triggers major anxiety in myself. I always worry that when I mess up, people will stop calling, texting, writing, talking to me etc. I know people make mistakes all the time, but I'm overly critical of myself. To the point of ridiculousness!!! I sometimes wish there was a magic pill I could take to rid myself of this anxiety, but I know there is not. I just let it get the best of me!!!
I've heard meditation is a great way to deal with anxiety. Today, I attempted to do so. I'm not sure if I was successful in "freeing my mind," but I have to say it was very relaxing as I just tried concentrating on relaxing my body and breathing. I feel some what better. I think that with time this could become a great way to help control my anxiety.
I believe that it is very embarrassing to suffer from such anxiety. I don't like sharing because I'm afraid people will think I'm nutso! I hope people realize that I'm just like everyone else. Everyone has issues they have to deal with. I'm not crazy, just a little... okay a lot over-analytical. (High strung as some people would call it) I think my high stress job just may add to it a little bit.
To sum up.... I'm trying to overcome my fear letting people down to calm the anxiety in my life. Guess what people, I may let you down sometimes. It's never intentional, but it happens. I hope that I don't disappoint you, but if I do, please remember that I'm human. I make mistakes. (Also remembering to tell myself that as well). "Don't keep crying because of a mistake. LEARN FROM IT and MOVE ON. Stop blaming yourself over things that you have NO control over."